She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Randomize
