shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize