I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize