Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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