This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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