All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
