I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
