Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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