Your face is a jimmy john
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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