Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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