at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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