i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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