shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
dude. I can hear the air.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
