So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
