We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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