I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
When did angry sex become our thing?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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