Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
