Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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