Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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