Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
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