Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
