my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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