P.S. I can't hear my feet
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Randomize
