It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
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