His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
