True but thats because hes a fetus.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
