the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
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