I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
