we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
