sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
