new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
