Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Randomize