It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
