Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
