those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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