what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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