I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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