We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
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