Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize