Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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