i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
