Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
