absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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