you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
