Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
