He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
