I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Randomize
