i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
organizing the empties. That sober.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
