So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
