shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
