he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Congratulations! We have a period
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